It seems crazy to me that a year ago, practically to the moment, I had just pushed you out into the world and was drinking in your sweet face. The roundness of your cheeks, the crystal clear blueness of your eyes, the softness of your skin, the delicate rosebud of your lips, the ten perfect fingers and toes. You were so alert in that first hour after birth. You stared in quiet wonder while we snapped photos and passed you around the room. I was the last one to hold you which was probably a good thing considering I WOULD NEVER LET YOU GO AGAIN. With the birth of your brother, I was given the title Mother. With your birth, I grew into that role and realized what kind of Mother I want to be to you boys. You have forced me, very happily I should add, to grow and stretch in ways I never thought my person could handle. I am so very blessed that you have come into my life.

This past year you’ve gone from a sweet bundle of lump, very easy to entertain and care for, to a mobile, walking, talking (it’s mostly gibberish BUT STILL) baby with opinions! And lots of personality. I’ve been composing this post in my head for weeks, as I’ve watched you grow and change, but I can’t seem to come up with something perfect enough for you. I would love to capture a piece of your almost gone babyness and bottle it up on this web page forever, but despite all of our modern technological advancements, I can’t quite perform that miracle yet. I just can’t believe you’ve been in our lives for a year. It seems as though you’ve been here forever and life didn’t really begin until you arrived. So when words fail me, I’ll just say thank you. Thank you for choosing us, Baby Boy. You’re perfect.

Let’s all ignore the fact that I have nothing witty and intelligent to say and instead admire the cute baby!

Laughing Baby from Magic Mom on Vimeo.
Sorry for putting the camera down. I had no nom baby cheeks. Nom Nom Nomnom Nomnomnomnomonm. Awww, cute baby!!

Feeling cooped up in the house on a bright, beautiful, warm, Florida day (which pretty much sums up EVERY day in South Florida), the boys and I decided to head to a park near our development. I try to do this several times a week, if for no other reason than I like to be consistent. I’m also trying to make Friends with Kids because it would be nice to have play dates once in a while, but also to have Adult Conversation. Have I mentioned I’m really shy and I have a really hard time making friends? Turns out, people don’t ever get to know you if you don’t open your mouth and talk once in a while. Yeah! I know! I didn’t know either! Where was I? Oh yes, The Park!

We took lots of pictures, which wasn’t any fun at all because “Wait! Stop! I know you’re having fun, but don’t move so I can take a picture!” is surely annoying. All that stopping and focusing and setting up a shot resulted in a lot of these types of pictures:

There was still much fun to be had! Lots of swinging!

Much sand was dug!

The sand was a whole new experience for the baby. He didn’t eat any of it luckily.

There was lots of sliding down slides and jumping from high places!

There was also some relaxing, which was nice.

There was lots of moving from one place to another.

We had a pretty good time. Didn’t we, Baby One?

I think he agrees.

I made a slideshow for the Baby One. Clearly, it’s my first one, but I suspect I’ll b getting much better at it. Ha. Ha. Ha. Gotta go! Time for a bath– for the boys.

TCW 8 Months from Magic Mom on Vimeo.

When I started this Grace 365 Project, I didn’t plan on doing it every day because I knew that would just be unreasonable. So! I’m doing it for 365 days, just not consecutively. Also! I’ve had One of Those Days for several days now and those were consecutively. However! Last night the baby slept very well and now I feel refreshed!

Yesterday I went down to visit the Him which is an hour drive in the southernly direction, so I must take my mom or dad to help with the driving when the Baby One starts to cry. I am very good at Puppet Shows and Offering Things for Distraction. Also! I am not a very good singer, but I make funny and interesting voices which provide hours minutes of amusement. I have become very adept at Nursing While Baby One is in the Car Seat, which I know is not recommended, but when there is lots of screaming and crying and boo-hooing it works. It wasn’t The Worst Car Trip Ever, but it easily makes Top Ten.

After about 2700 “Are we there yets?” from the Older One, we pulled into the driveway of the hospital. This is what we are calling the detox center because it’s just easier and also it is sort of a hospital. But! It doesn’t really look like a hospital because it’s really more of a house with a nursing station and a staff. I had brought the Him tons of DVDs, sweaters (because they keep that place like Antartica cold), mint brownies, rice krispy treats, artwork from the Older One, and his report card (!). The Him was very happy, mostly to see his beloved family but also because I brought the brownies. He looks good, very healthy and animated. His color has returned and the extreme swelling in his legs has gone down. These things make me feel hopeful, like we can start living the life we were meant to have.

It’s always tearful pulling away from the little house. The Older One wants Papa to come with us, the Baby One is wailing about his car seat, and I’m just confused how I’ll manage another week with the ruffians that are my children. And also I wish that the Him was pulling out with us. The Baby One had a wonderful night’s sleep last night and I’m very much feeling as though I can make it another week. Provided the Baby One keeps sleeping relatively well and no one breaks out with any colds, we should be just fine.

Last night, I snuggled with both boys as we all drifted off into the Land of Nod and I was grateful. I am grateful for so many things, but mostly that we are all alive and healthy and able to function as a happy family unit (even if we are missing one right now). I am doing this Parenting By Myself Experiment and I am doing it well. No one is more shocked and amazed than I am. This thing we call mothering? I’m pretty good at it. Although it’s fair to say, my kids make this job easy. The Older One always has a smile when I’m feeling anxious, a joke when I’m feeling sad, a helpful hand when I’m cooking dinner, and a hug when when I need love. He is taking this time apart from Papa with the grace and maturity of a boy three times his age. He makes my heart swell with pride, adoration, and love. The Baby One has been a joy to be around. He is giggly, sweet (if not always smelling then acting), and perfect. He reminds me to relax and enjoy the minute and to not take myself to seriously. He is my perfect Little Buddy and he makes being his mother easy.

So, Grace 7/365 should be fairly easy today, right?

• Cupcakes. I just love me some little cakes of sweet, delicious, yumminess. And I’ve got some seriously good recipes to try out over the next few weeks.
• The Baby One having a good night sleep. Above all else, sleep is my most treasure thing and I need lots of it in order to function well. When the Baby One sleeps well, I sleep well. Yay, sleep!
• School days. They provide a much needed break. When else am I going to shower?
• The massage gift certificate just waiting to be used. ZOMG! I can’t wait to use this. The anticipation of the massage is almost as good as the massage itself. Almost.
• Visits with the Him. It’s like recharging my battery and now I know I can make it another week without him. It helps, even if only a little bit and that rocks.